Just sitting here with a Pepto Bismol smoothie, trying to ward off the nausea and heartburn of another Senator loss, 4-0 in Boston. I’m still trying to keep the faith. Really. The Sens finished off the month of March today with a record of 5-5-2. Their February-March record was 10-13-4. Maybe, to quote ex-Cardinals head coach Dennis Green, they are who we think they are.
No. Must not think that way. Like the good book (NHL media guide) says, they are the defending Eastern Conference champions. They cannot be this bad. Can they? Of course not! But my belief is shaken. I need some evidence that they might be able to flick the switch on opening night of the playoffs. A sign.
Then, one hour ago, I sat down at my desk. I hopped online and discovered encouragement from Daniel Alfredsson. O Captain! My Captain! Is our fearful trip done? The ship has weather’d every rack, will the prize we seek be won?
By online video, Alfie has assured us all, everything will change. There will now be increased sacrifice because, “The Cup Changes Everything.” Got that? The cup changes EVERYTHING.
Watch Alfie in the video below that came from above, providing much needed sustenance to the playoff faith of Sens’ followers. I just know what you naysayers will say, other than "nay" of course. You naysayers will suggest that was just something some NHL PR hack told him to say.
Blasphemy! Play it! Play it! And the glory will be revealed in all it's, uh...glory!!
Alfie says the cup will change everything. Like an exorcism. The shaky goaltending, the horrible disorganized play in their own end, the overall lack of intensity. Everything. Alfie said so. And if you’re going to second guess Alfie, you’re going to have to go through me first. Once I borrow my neighbour’s big dog.
The cup had better change everything or on the deck with mournful tread, the Sens will be fallen, cold and dead.
And somewhere, Walt Whitman does a triple salchow in his grave.