He's Always a Woman To Me

The gold medal winner in the 800 metres is going to be tested by the IAAF. But not for steroids.

They just want to, you know, make sure she’s not a man.

18 year old Caster Semenya (at least she has a nice feminine name) will undergo gender testing after her win Wednesday night at the World Track and Field Championships. Along with other things she may have removed, she has taken 8 seconds off her time in the last year, which is unheard of improvement.

She doesn’t seem to have an adam’s apple. Seeing her in tights, it doesn’t appear there’s any male business going on down there. But how can that not be a man? Seriously.

That's not just a man but that's a scary man who wants to rip someone's head off.

She has apparently dealt with this her whole life, often prevented from entering female restrooms. It last happened at the doctor's office when she was preparing for a prostate exam (I kid, I kid).

Apparently, the testing process involves a good deal more than just dropping the pants. Blood testing and stuff. I don’t see why dropping trou and giving docotrs a good look isn't enough. I get that you can remove the male business but the female business is pretty much god given, isn’t it? I don’t care how good the cosmetic surgeon is, you can’t fake the female business. I have limited access to that equipment over the course of any given week but I do know it's pretty complicated equipment, impossible to replicate through surgery.

Let’s simplify. Here’s the easiest gender test I can think of. Drop Caster off in an expensive shoe store and see what happens.